Abu Ghraib, New Jersey
I heard her yammering upstairs in our bedroom so I crept up to see what kind of charming world she was creating this time. Was it princesses or a menagerie of friendly stuffed animals? I turned the corner and was stunned to see this scene unfolding on our bed. She had placed the cloth pouch used for game pieces over the head her doll!
Then, much to my horror, she cinched the bag closed around the doll's neck! Oh, my God! What ghastly game is this she's playing!? Next stop, the child psychologist.
"Dad, what is that?"
Can you imagine! 9-years old and doesn't recognize a pack of cigarettes! Perhaps next I'll show her a typewriter, an 8-track cartridge and a black and white television.
Have you ever impulse purchased a CD from Amazon.com because it was really cheap and then, once it arrived and you go to tuck it into your CD rack, found that you ALREADY OWN A COPY?
No, of course you haven't. Only someone with the attention span of a gnat would do that.
Would anybody like a free copy of Genius: Warren Zevon's Greatest Hits? His songs are like really great short stories, mostly about broken, fucked up lives, all weaved with sometimes gentle, sometimes chugging, piano.
Well, I'm sittin' here playing solitaire
With my pearl-handled deck
The county won't give me no more methadone
And they cut off your welfare check.
Carmelita hold me tighter
I think I'm sinking down
And I'm all strung out on heroin
On the outskirts of town
Edit: The CD is gone. It's going to Ireland! Thank you for playing.