The Unbearable Banishment: Beauty queen confidential

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Beauty queen confidential

I am doll eyes
Doll mouth, doll legs
I am doll arms, big veins, dog bait
Yeah, they really want you, they really do
I want to be the girl with the most cake

Doll Parts

Have you ever had an evening that wasn’t suppose to amount to much, but turned out to be magic? I love those.

I am full of hidden prejudices. I'm working hard to rid myself of them but the fact is that I have preconceived notions about some people. I am predisposed to dislike certain types. It’s ugly and unfair.

For instance, politicians. In my mind, politicians are inherently prone to corruption and are not to be trusted. The fact that you would even want to be a politician is an indication that you have a flawed personality. If one of The Daughters marries a politician, I will fell like I failed them.

I was in the city for an interview. Afterwards, I was meeting someone for dinner, but the dinner fell through at the last minute. I sent out a few text messages on my way to the train station and received an invitation to meet a friend and his girlfriend for drinks. They were drinking in one of those unique Manhattan pubs. It’s a converted barge that’s anchored off the 26th Street pier. They were outside on the upper deck. You walk along the side of the ship to the stern and then up a spiral staircase. Cool breeze. Sun setting over New Jersey. The Hudson River slowly floating by. The pub gently rocks. To hell with the train, I decided.

My friend’s girlfriend represented the Dominican Republic in a recent Miss World competition. I’ve seen pics of her and have been wanting to meet her (OF COURSE). She’s a beauty queen. What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you think of beauty pageants? Yeah, me too. JonBenét Ramsey, the nauseating world of child beauty pageants and vapid contestants.

In person, she is so stunning that I was taken aback when I first sat down. Once I regained my composure, I realized that she was speaking in complete, coherent sentences, despite the fact that English is her second language. (She taught herself English by watching TV. She speaks three languages to my one). She couldn’t have been more charming and down to earth. Funny. A good listener. She told interesting stories about living in China for 40 days while in a pageant.

She can’t work in the U.S. because of some immigration documents that haven’t been processed yet. What does she do with all that free time? Does she walk up and down 5th Avenue and spend my friend’s money as quickly as possible? Sit all day and chat with models? Nay. She volunteers. She took it upon herself to find where she could be of good use to the underprivileged. Nobody was looking over her shoulder. It wasn’t to bolster her resume.

Quick to judge. Slow to understand. I wonder what else I’m wrong about?

By the time we left, the boat was packed, packed, packed with the after-work city drones. We walked down the spiral staircase and there was a narrow path out through the crowd. We had to walk single file, my friend first, then his girlfriend, and then me. As we walked through the crowd, I saw men and women freeze in their spot and just stare as she passed by. As though they couldn’t believe their eyes.


Blogger Barlinnie said...

....and you did get her number right? Please do not leave it here for the love of all things horny!

April 10, 2010 at 3:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i have the same bias. by the end of the evening, i'm sure i would have been smitten as well... bar sounds pretty neat. on my list of things to do!

April 10, 2010 at 8:38 AM  
Blogger Cat said...

Uhm, where's the picture?

The last time I was in NYC, we had to make an emergency run to H&M to get something I had forgotten to pack(absolute worlds worst packer here) and there was a couple in there that was unbelievably stunning. I barely remember the woman who was beautiful, because the man outshone her. He was young, maybe 25, but dressed in the nicest suit I've ever seen, and he was super tall, like 6'8". I still wonder about him today. What was his story. Those people in that bar will not soon forget the pleasure of seeing Friend's Girlfriend.

April 10, 2010 at 9:17 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Jimmy: I am celebrating 13 years of fidelity with Mrs. Wife. (Do you think that was easy? For either of us?) I am certainly not going to tarnish my unblemished record with my friend's girlfriend!!

Daisy: We need to drop the attitude, don't you think? You'll love the bar. It's like no other.

Cat: It's so funny you should say that! I was DYING to take a picture of us and post it, but I was afraid it would annoy my friend. She's not a bauble to show off. He has feelings for her. But, Lord, it would have been great to attach a photo to this post.

April 10, 2010 at 9:26 AM  
Blogger said...

It sounds like the perfect evening, especially the drinks on the barge...and yea, it did make me think about how I spend my time.

April 10, 2010 at 9:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Interesting anecdote.

There are reasons why people come into our lives - briefly or for extended periods of time - and it seems like meeting her has helped you identify something in you that required a bit of growth or evolving.

You painted a vivid mental picture of the barge/bar for me. Thanks.

April 10, 2010 at 10:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mom always said "never judge a book by it's cover" guess we should have listened to her better. I am just as guilty as you.

April 10, 2010 at 10:24 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Suzanne: The beauty of the evening was that it was completely unplanned. It took me by surprise. They don't happen often, but when they do...

Tome: I am more of a cynic. I think that meeting people and important events occur in your life randomly and without reason. But it's good if you learn something from them.

MT: Yes, she did try to tell us over and over. SHE never use to judge anyone! She had an open heart.

April 10, 2010 at 10:38 AM  
Blogger mapstew said...

I think this is something we are all guilty of UB.

I wonder how many of us would have become friends in the 'real world'?

:¬) Have a great weekend pal.

April 10, 2010 at 11:58 AM  
Blogger Leah said...

Well I'm in love just reading this. So I can imagine the swooning in person.

I have dozens of prejudices, most of them easily dismissed when I'm confronted with the reality of someone.

And yes--I love those surprise evenings of serendipitous magic.

April 10, 2010 at 12:16 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Map: Now, ain't that the sad truth? And most of us don't even know it.

I turned myself to face me
But I've never caught a glimpse
Of how the others must see the faker

Leah: I, too have dozens of minor prejudices that amount to nothing but, sadly, there ARE a few that require my immediate attention.

April 10, 2010 at 2:50 PM  
Blogger Pueblo girl said...

How did the interview go?

Looking forward to the story about meeting an honourable politician (I share this particular prejudice).

Nice you met someone who didn't fall into the Bukowski stereotype of beautiful women. Like everyone, I know lots of women who are attractive, but once, I worked with a (lovely) woman who was totally stunning. She was really fed up with the way she was perceived.

April 10, 2010 at 3:58 PM  
Blogger Here In Franklin said...

Trust me--that freezing thing gets old after a few years. :)

April 10, 2010 at 5:10 PM  
Blogger Lori said...

You are so right about politicians. I hate them all. :)

But besides that, I try not to stereotype people - it's hard tho, isn't it? Just our nature i guess, and beautiful women are so often the target of misconceptions.
I love stories like this and it happens so often -when i take the time to get to know others i'm almost always impressed. (Just the opposite with politicians tho - the more I know, the more I hate)

April 10, 2010 at 5:25 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

PG: The interview went very, very well. Thank you for asking. Don't hold your breath waiting for my post about an honest politician. And kudos for the Bukowski reference!

HIF: Is that true? Can you tell me how many years exactly? I'll set an alert in my phone.

Lori: You know what they say. Admitting it's a problem is the first step. At least I have some self-awareness about it. And 10,000 THANK-YOUS for your thoughtful comments in my previous post.

April 10, 2010 at 5:59 PM  
Anonymous nursemyra said...

Nice story UB. We have some great volunteers where I work too, I admire people who give up their time to help others.

Also, I remember a visit to Melbourne when I was waiting at a cafe for my sister to arrive. As she walked towards me, people were stopping in their tracks and turning to stare at her, she looked like some glamourous old time movie star, it was a lovely moment in time.....

April 10, 2010 at 8:51 PM  
Blogger Poindexter said...

Fabulous story. Sounds like it was an excellent afternoon. Plus, it's a good reminder about the true nature of beauty and why we should care about looking for it in the places that are not so readily accessible. Bravo = well done.

April 10, 2010 at 9:53 PM  
Anonymous neeeekole. said...

good song. oh how i love your blogs about the ladies. lol

April 11, 2010 at 12:34 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Nurse: That's a great story about you sister! I'm average looking and have always wondered what it would be like to walk down the street and turn heads.

Point: It was a lesson in how I stupidly size people up by the way they look. Mental note to self: grow up.

Nick: I'm surrounded by ladies. Drowning in them, in fact.

April 11, 2010 at 8:05 AM  
Blogger Ellie said...

I have a special relationship with the DR (My Man and his family). Another famous beauty from the island republic is the lovely Zoe from Star Trek and Avatar fame.

April 11, 2010 at 2:04 PM  
Anonymous popomatic.jeff said...

Politicians have to prove themselves before they earn my trust. Until they do, I'm predisposed to thinking that they are sleazy, self-serving, assholes.

April 12, 2010 at 11:44 AM  
Anonymous Sid said...

LOL! I was also wondering why there wasn't a photo of her. And yep, I'm totally guilty of the same thing. I always pleasantly surprised when a gorgeous women is smart, independant and SWEET.

April 13, 2010 at 6:40 AM  

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