The Unbearable Banishment: New York City/New Years math

Friday, December 31, 2010

New York City/New Years math

New York City + New Year's Eve = RUN AWAY!

Taken about :30 minutes ago near Times Square during my escape.

I spent New Year's Eve in Times Square exactly ONCE. There were four of us and it took me all of :15 minutes to get separated from my friends. I was pushed into a coral by the police and stood there by myself and froze my ass off. Nobody would talk to me because I looked like the lone loser who wandered into a party by himself. Midnight struck and while it was a pretty spectacular moment, I can't say it was worth the hassle. By 12:15 all of Times Square was deserted.

Happy New Year, everyone. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to hide under my bed from all the amateur drunks.

Incidentally, as a point of clarification, tomorrow is the first day of "twenty-eleven," not "two thousand eleven." When it was 1999, we didn't call it "one thousand, nine hundred and ninety-nine," did we?

Is it just me? You can tell me. I can take it.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

it is amateur night. best to stay off the roads and hunker in the bunker... but i have visions of you building a fort from blankets and couch cushions, while Mrs. Wife and the girls feed you saltines and hot chocolate...

December 31, 2010 at 3:44 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Daisy: And the weed, don't forget! (Woops. Did I just type that?)

December 31, 2010 at 3:50 PM  
Blogger savannah said...

amateur night is right! NYE in times square is like spending the night on colorado blvd in pasadena to watch the rose parade on new years day! you do it ONCE and thereafter watch from the comfort and warmth of your own home! happy new year, sugar! and yes, it will be the year twenty-eleven xoxoxox

*snickering because you said weed*

December 31, 2010 at 3:55 PM  
Blogger Ellie said...

I snapped a pick at a Barnes and Noble in Colorado of the magazine rack: Weed World was featured prominently.

December 31, 2010 at 4:22 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Sav: I also went to the Macy's parade ONCE. That was enough for that, too. And happy birthday!

Ellie: You can tell changes are coming when a staid company like Barnes & Noble will carry a publication like Weed World!

December 31, 2010 at 4:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lost my enthusiasm for public partying long ago.
A friend in London says, as she'll see it first, she'll vet it and send it back if it's no good!
But here's to all of us. And to blogging which has led me to NY(to hide from the Ball Drop!)
Happy New Year,guys!

December 31, 2010 at 5:23 PM  
Blogger mapstew said...

It was my first NYE at home since 2000! Had a most wonderful evening with the fam, watching great music live on BBC, drinking Mojitos, playing board games (great fun with Mojitos!), and singing, and dancing! And wee'd, yes I wee'd a lot!

A happy and prosperous 2011 to you and the fam my friend! :¬)

December 31, 2010 at 9:35 PM  
Blogger CiCi said...

I have never had the desire to be in large crowds and have avoided large crowds of drunk people, amateur or not. Yikes. Glad to know you will be safe this year and I hope the new year is wonderful for you and your family.

January 1, 2011 at 7:23 AM  
Blogger Cat said...

Just thinking of NYE in Times Square make break out into a cold sweat. I watched movies with the girl and her friend while Yankee flew to Moscow. No NYE kiss = :( No crowds or drunks = :)

January 1, 2011 at 8:54 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

MIT: I think public drunkenness is a young man/woman's game. If you see a drunken adult stumbling around the street, chances are they're not having any fun. Safe travels to you.

Map: You used "weed" as a verb! Well done! Looking forward to more zingers like that in 2011.

TB: If you're averse to crowds, then you'd best keep your distance from NYC! Happy new year. New year, new home!

Cat: Watching Times Square on TV in the comfort of your home is the way to go. Happy new year to you, the girl and His Yankeeness.

January 1, 2011 at 9:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Or as mom would have said "two o one one" Happy New Year to you and the family...

January 1, 2011 at 1:06 PM  
Blogger Chris said...

I can't believe everyone missed a whole decade of opportunities to say twenty-oh something.

January 1, 2011 at 3:31 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

MT: Thanks. To you guys, too. Tried to call but nobody home!

Chris: More importantly, what are they going to call that decade? What would be the snappy equivalent to the 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s, and 90s? The aughts?

January 1, 2011 at 5:25 PM  
Anonymous nursemyra said...

Hey UB.... wishing you and yours a wonderful 2011 xxx

January 2, 2011 at 2:55 AM  
Blogger Eryl said...

Bugger, blogger swallowed my comment! So I'll just say Happy New Year, and be done.

January 2, 2011 at 6:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, it's definitely you.

January 3, 2011 at 4:22 AM  
Blogger Pat said...

Twenty eleven makes sense to me. Happy New Year and may your wishes come true.
I discovered some time ago that the world doesn't actually come to an end if I go to bed before midnight on NYE. Probably the only night of the year that I do.

January 3, 2011 at 4:49 AM  
Blogger Sausage said...

Just got back from your fair city and I (We) are in love. I will be back...
Happy New Year

January 3, 2011 at 4:35 PM  

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