The Unbearable Banishment: Markie's Choice [w/apologies to Wm. Styron]

Friday, January 4, 2013

Markie's Choice [w/apologies to Wm. Styron]

Snack time at Casa de Intolerable.What to do?

In my left hand, a ripe, succulent, easy to peel, clementine. Rip its peel and the air is perfumed with the fragrance of citrus and flowers. Separate its wedges, bite into its soft, orange flesh and your mouth comes alive with sunshine and orchards, while sweet, cold juice trickles down your chin. Delicious. Best of all, it's healthy.

In my right hand is a mini cream puff from LaRossa Bakery. Also pretty good, as you can well imagine, but not the healthy choice.

Can you guess which one? 

I ate BOTH of 'em. HA. In fact, I ate TWO of those damn cream puffs. They were mini. I'm a very long ways away from having a problem with my waistline, so I can afford the indulgence. But don't be jealous and don't hate me. I hang on my cross for some awful things that aren't fit for public disclosure. Like you, I didn't escape venomous fate. But I don't have a propensity to gain weight as readily as most. I've got that going for me.

*     *     *

I know a place where you can get a festive holiday, alcohol-spiked hot beverage, sit outdoors under a toasty heat lamp and watch people fall on their asses on the ice. Every winter they install a ice rink and a pop-up restaurant in Bryant Park. It makes for a hell of an evening. I dragged Daisyfae here once! You get a table along the perimeter of the rink, sit under a McDonald's french fry lamp, and watch the show.

My friend steals a bite of my mac-n-cheese. Inside the two glass mugs are a hot chocolate/Kahlua/vanilla Absolute/shaved chocolate/whipped cream concoction. Boy was it sweet! And expensive. [I got my thumb in the photo! What an amateur! I decided to not crop it out. My beautiful flaws.]

The Empire State with her holiday crown through the Bryant Park trees.

Skating under her shadow. They cleared everyone off the ice to run the Zamboni. A Master of Ceremonies skated out to the middle of the rink and announced a Lion King ticket give-a-way. He read a girl's name into the microphone. From the crowd, she skates out to claim her tickets, hand-in-hand with her boyfriend. When they get to the middle of the empty rink, with all of New York City watching, bright, white spotlights beaming down, the boyfriend drops to one knee and asks for her hand in marriage. The ticket give-a-way was a ruse. What a clever boy. She said yes.


Blogger Gorilla Bananas said...

I don't get these public marriage proposals. Suppose the girl says no and makes him look like a goof? Why make a show of such an intimate negotiation? If they'd rehearsed it beforehand it might be OK as a form of street theatre.

January 4, 2013 at 7:11 AM  
Blogger Furtheron said...

That boy is either... a genius, lucky or just making the rest of us males look bleeding useless.... GIT!

January 4, 2013 at 7:11 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

People do it because homo sapiens are EGOMANIACS. It's the same reason why we humans BLOG. We need an audience. Why do simians blog? What's in it for them?

January 4, 2013 at 7:19 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

I'm certain he wouldn't have done it if there had been a shadow of a doubt in him mind. Who could recover from that kind of public humiliation?! She seemed pretty happy about the whole thing, so I'd say it was in the bag.

January 4, 2013 at 7:20 AM  
Anonymous daisyfae said...

Hey, that's my ice rink! And my choco-alcohol concoction. You can have the mac and cheese... and the romance.

In the back of my head is always the nagging thought that the more public the engagement, and the larger the wedding circus, the less likely it is for the marriage to last. i mean, how can you keep up that level of performance art in a marriage? even more important question, why marry someone who expects it?

yes. cynic. me. my flaw. not beautiful, but practical.

January 4, 2013 at 7:28 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

You're not being a cynic. Like me, you've got some mileage on your treads and along with that comes some insight. The big, elaborate, engagement and wedding spectaculars are for kids, really. If people took a more sanguine approach to marriage and not get so wrapped up in which crudité to serve at the reception, there's be fewer divorces.

January 4, 2013 at 7:46 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Good choice pal. I'd have gladly savoured both the wee cake AND the even sweeter Daisyfae in an instant.

January 4, 2013 at 3:28 PM  
Blogger OldLady Of The Hills said...

Sounds very Romantic to me...! And, I venture to say, he had no doubt what the answer would be....!
Love the pictures, my dear....The Empire State Building looks glorious and so does Bryant Park...!

January 4, 2013 at 3:41 PM  
Blogger dinahmow said...

I'm another wedding cynic.It should be a personal and private arrangement between the two parties. Party to celebrate, if that's what floats your boat, but all the broo-haha? Doesn't sit well with me.

And is it only TWO YEARS since we met? I miss NY.

January 4, 2013 at 4:40 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Do you know the old joke? About a sea food diet? When I see food, I eat it. I'm lucky that I don't blow up like a balloon. Daisy tells good stories.

January 4, 2013 at 9:04 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

The kid gets very high marks for originality. He certainly took me by surprise! There's a new l.e.d. lighting display on the Empire State. Dancing colorful lights. It debuted on New Year's Eve. Did you see it?

January 4, 2013 at 9:05 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

I can see their point. An awful lot of people were gushing and so happy for them. Mainly women. But I'm the quiet type.

January 4, 2013 at 9:06 PM  
Blogger Ms Scarlet said...

Thin people get high cholesterol too. Just saying :-)
I'm not so keen on public displays of affection either... it's a bit like being psychologically bullied into submission!!

January 5, 2013 at 5:11 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

I don't know what cholesterol is. Seriously! Is that more sad or arrogant? I can't decide.

January 5, 2013 at 8:36 AM  
Blogger savannah said...

you had me with the picture, sugar! i had to come back to read the rest and now comment! ;~) (i LOVE clementines! i bought a little crate of them before we left to share with my pal for housesitting and left some in the fridge for our return... heavenly! but i digress...

re proposals, weddings and PDAs...44 years ago this coming 8th of march, we got married. we spent a grand total of 200usd on the entire event. and the proposal? we were living together and i remember turning to him one early morning after the phone rang (his mother) and saying, "we really should get married, so i can answer the phone whenever it rings." he agree.

love your pictures, sweetpea! here's to some drinks soon in NYC with you! xoxoxo

January 5, 2013 at 10:22 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Thanks for that post-quality comment. I love the little clementine wooden crates. I hate throwing them away but don't know what else to do. 20 years ago I would have kept my cassette tapes in them. Congratulations on 44 years! It just goes to show that all the engagement/wedding pageantry is nothing but window dressing.

January 5, 2013 at 10:50 AM  
Blogger Pat said...

I shall think of your poetic first para when I eat my nightly clementine to stem the cravings for naughty things. Except tonight is special and I can fill my boots.

January 5, 2013 at 10:54 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Don't you think it's miraculous that now, in the dead of winter, you can go to your refrigerator and pull out a fresh clementine? I'm still amazed by that.

January 5, 2013 at 2:35 PM  
Blogger Eryl said...

I'd have eaten both, too, though I am in danger of becoming house-sized at the moment so am avoiding temptation.

The chocolate booze thing sounds good.

January 5, 2013 at 3:02 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

The chocolate booze thing looks good on paper but it was far too sweet. My friend took about four sips and backed off. I had to drink hers and then mine. Not kidding. It was too bloody expensive to waste.

January 5, 2013 at 3:55 PM  
Blogger mapstew said...

I used to be like you, rakish good looks, eat what I want, mwahahahaha!

It ends.
And it's coming to a belly near you.

(Had to do it pal!) :¬)

January 5, 2013 at 9:24 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

No! It can't be true! Surely I'm immune? Only time and mini creampuffs will tell. I hope you're sadly mistaken.

January 5, 2013 at 10:01 PM  
Blogger Kono said...

We simians blog for a bit of rational discoure on a plethora of topics and to escape from humanity dammit!

January 6, 2013 at 8:19 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

I thought you did it because you are paid in bananas and hair lice.

January 6, 2013 at 8:46 PM  
Blogger Twisted Scottish Bastard said...

Couldn't you have given the mini-cream puff to someone who really nedded it, like Coco? I'm sure you would have felt much better.

I do hope that poor girl on the ski rink didn't feel pressured into saying yes.

January 6, 2013 at 9:09 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

That'll be the day when I give my mini creampuff to that rotten mutt.

The girl looked delighted. I wonder if the guy felt pressured into doing something spectacular and public?

January 6, 2013 at 9:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How much were those spiked hot chocolates, dare I ask? I hope the cozy spot next to the ice rink was worth it!

January 6, 2013 at 11:15 PM  
Blogger Ellie said...

Agree with gorilla in incomprehension in the face of public marriages. My (idiot) brother did it once; she said yes, but they never did tie the knot. (Thank God.)

January 7, 2013 at 2:51 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

I think they were about $14 bucks apiece. You're paying for that view. And yes, they're totally worth it. A holiday treat that I indulge in every year. Money, schmoney. It's Christmastime.

January 7, 2013 at 9:16 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

I did the dirty deed in private on a boardwalk in Provincetown, MA. Provincetown is one of the gay epicenters along the east coast so I thought I'd compromise the vibe with a wedding proposal. She said yes and followed-through. The rest, etc.

January 7, 2013 at 9:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mom use to eat clementines all the time they remind me of her.

January 7, 2013 at 3:28 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

The apple(s) never fall far from the tree. Nor the clementines.

January 7, 2013 at 4:12 PM  
Anonymous Sid said...

Favourite part of this blog post? Everyone's comment on the public engagement. Personally, I think it's all very cute. Yes, there is the chance of public humiliation, but surely your and your other have talked about this important next step? You don't just spring this type of thing on someone.

January 8, 2013 at 5:02 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

I think you're right. There's just no WAY he's going to pull a stunt like this unless he's 110% certain she's going to say yes. Who knows? She might have been wondering what took him so damn long? I haven't searched for it but I'll bet the whole episode is up on YouTube by now.

January 8, 2013 at 5:43 AM  
Blogger Young at Heart said...

ooh be still my beating heart, I once lived in the shadow of the Empire State a well known Moroccan restaurant in London, a parade of waiters came trooping in with sparklers a blaze carrying a cake and singing a very arabic happy birthday.......I thought poor whoever that's for, smuggly pleased that my boyfriend would never do something so hideously embarassing..........even though we were there celebrating my birthday the penny didn't drop till they arrived at our table beating their drum. I was forced to stand on a chair while they continued to wail and everyone joined in the clapping.....the relationship did not last!!!

January 9, 2013 at 6:10 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

I'm jealous that you lived so close to the Empire State but am glad to not have suffered the birthday humiliation. It sounds like one of those horrible office birthday celebrations where everyone uncomfortably sings happy birthday in low, muddled voices.

January 9, 2013 at 6:54 AM  

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