The Unbearable Banishment: using my cell phone jammer knowledge for good instead of evil

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

using my cell phone jammer knowledge for good instead of evil

This gem is from the New York Times:

South Carolina petitioned the Federal Communications Commission on Monday to protect the public safety by blocking signals from contraband cellphones emanating from prisons.

Of course, the scumbag lobbyists jumped into the fray with this line of nonsense:

Lobbyists for telecommunication companies say that any weakening of antijamming legislation could become a slippery slope that eventually could inappropriately limit cellphone use.

Why can't they just come right out and say they're worried that the industry's revenue stream will be compromised? What is "inappropriate?" Washington lobbyists occupy the same rung on the moral ladder as old men who expose themselves on the subway.

Do you suppose I can get a paying gig as a jamming consultant/expert. I've got plenty of field knowledge that I would happily share.

* * *

In the gym locker room this morning I saw a man hold a hair dryer over his shoulder and dry his back hair.

I wretched.

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10 Comments:

Blogger Barlinnie said...

Right turn Clyde?

July 14, 2009 at 1:48 PM  
Blogger Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Grim. Don't blow dry, wax.

July 14, 2009 at 1:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

guys i used to work out with saw a gent who regularly used a blow dryer on his feet. back hair? [shudder] deal-freakin'-breaker.

July 14, 2009 at 3:48 PM  
Blogger Sid said...

Dried his back hair ... Eeeeuw. You know you really didn't have to share this type of information.

July 15, 2009 at 10:42 AM  
Anonymous mstngsal22 said...

I'm sure they're just mostly calling their pastors and their moms, of course, the dears. And I think it's really sexy, the back hair drying thing. It's when they get out the curling iron that my eyebrows go up...

July 15, 2009 at 11:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, I guess putting your shirt on over all that wet hair would be promblematic. Wouldn't want to be around during a full moon, though.

July 15, 2009 at 11:54 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Jimmy: I turn where I burn.

Jo: Wax = PAIN.

Daisy: I dated a girl who had hair on her nipples. Long ones. It, too, was a deal breaker.

Sid: I MUST share! Otherwise, how will you know?

mstSal: The irony was that he had very little hair on top. What a joker that God is!

HIF: I can understand why he does it. I just don't want to see the process.

July 15, 2009 at 12:16 PM  
Blogger Blues said...

I wonder if he braided it afterwards

July 15, 2009 at 5:53 PM  
Blogger A Free Man said...

Well how do you propose that one dry his (or her) back pelt?

July 17, 2009 at 1:22 AM  
Anonymous jammer said...

Maybe I'm simple, but why is there even an argument? Unless authorities are using the false sense of security to get inmates talking on cell phones (and wiretapping them) - why would they possibly be against blocking signals in prisons?

August 3, 2009 at 12:53 PM  

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