The Unbearable Banishment: As I was saying...

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

As I was saying...

For the past few years, December has had the uncanny ability to be a watershed month for both joy and cruelty. The Christmas season arrives all wrapped up in a pretty package that contains bad news on my doorstep I couldn’t take one more step. So I didn’t care to write very much. It’s difficult to type with a 50-pound stone strapped to your back.

I used to have a pretty good belly laugh at the expense of people who constantly poured over facebook, twitter and other social media sites. Foursqare. Please. “Here I am everyone! Look at ME!” Don't be such a stooge for Madison Avenue. Get a life.

Then I stopped posting to my blog.

Those first few weeks of not posting exacerbated my melancholy. I couldn’t put my thumb on it. Then I recognized that old, familiar pang. I got the same blue blues you get from a break-up. As the years peel away, I find there are fewer and fewer people in my social circle. One of Christopher Hitchens' parting shots before he died was, "As you get older, you realize that you can’t meet any new old friends." And I realized that over the years, unbeknown to me, this stupid, tedious blog had become an on-call friend. This explains my weird obsession with my comments section. Along with my other issues, I was grieving over the loss of that connection.

Who’s laughing now?

It’s a shame that I didn't post any photos of the city over Christmas/New Years because that has become one of my favorite holiday traditions. The town gets all gussied up like an old, cheap, broken-down, 10-cent whore on my arm and I like to show her off. Bergdorf had the best window displays I‘ve ever seen. But the few times I sat at a keyboard, all it spat out was dreary junk. And you know what you do with dreary junk, don't you? You throw it in the garbage.

Thank-you x 1,000 for your thoughtful comments and emails.

* * *

I had these left over in my iPhone. Consider them a late entry for the holiday season.

Not all holiday window displays are of the heartfelt Norman Rockwell/ Hallmark variety, particularly here in New York. A drug store on 57th Street really knows how to get into the spirit of things in a Tim Burton-ish kind of way.

This consumer-crazed holiday shopper...


...is actually a monstrous 8-armed shopaholic, grabbing everything off a store shelf that comes within reach of her tentacles. To hell with credit card limits! This is Christmastime in America, baby!


Poor, clumsy Santa had a Christmas Eve mishap. This'll be one Christmas morning the kiddies will never forget.


As I gazed into Santa's glassy, dead eyes, I got the notion that this was once a female. So much gender confusion going on these days!


Ommmmmchristmas.


* * *

If things don't start to improve around here I could throw another hissy-fit and disappear again. Just so you know.

33 Comments:

Anonymous daisyfae said...

there you are! i've been worried sick about you, young man!

just for that? i'm coming out there again - mid-march. details as i get them sorted...

love the window pics. missed you.

January 10, 2012 at 4:45 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Is that so? I'll dust off my tour guide cap.

January 10, 2012 at 5:32 PM  
Blogger mapstew said...

He Lives! :¬)

January 10, 2012 at 6:23 PM  
Anonymous dinahmow said...

Yay! Not only back, but back with pictures.

And Daisyfae's going to be in NYC in March? No fair! I'm heading in the other direction.
stomps off in a huff...

January 10, 2012 at 6:41 PM  
Blogger Pat said...

SOOOO glad:)

January 10, 2012 at 7:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Funny I just saw you but really missed your blogs.....keep it up it's good for us followers even if it is painful for you at times. You need a blog about Coco.....
MT

January 10, 2012 at 7:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I found your blog about seven months ago and read everything you posted over the following two weeks, spacing them out like you do with a book you don't want to get to end of. I have no way of knowing what you're going through right now but please don't stop blogging unless it's to write in another genre. You're just too good.

January 10, 2012 at 8:01 PM  
Blogger savannah said...

*whew* you JUST saved yourself from *a fate worse than death, sugar! ;) yeah, that's right, an email from me, pumpkin! everybody's favorite cheerleader and nosey nudge! (yes, it's true, talk to the coconut krewe!) xoxoxoxox

January 10, 2012 at 8:06 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

map: I barely live, but alive I am.

Dinah: Daisy is my most frequent visitor, but you know the route as well as she does!

Pat: I missed you, too, dear.

MT: Coco...yes. Another mouth to feed. I'm already $90 in the hole for doctor bills.

January 10, 2012 at 8:46 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Anon: Holy smokes. That's like a 5-star meal to a man who is starving. Thank you verrrr much.

Sav: Thank you for your gracious New Year's greeting. You're a class act.

January 10, 2012 at 8:49 PM  
Anonymous Rob said...

Well, UB, I still read here, although I don't comment so much anymore. Wondered at your absence. Glad to see you back. Hope all is well in your neck of the woods.

January 10, 2012 at 10:00 PM  
Blogger Ponita in Real Life said...

I was wondering where the hell you went! Thought I'd missed something because of my sporadic time online what with the MoS occupying a bunch of my time on a regular basis. ;-)

Hopefully your blueness will dissipate and you can get your mojo back. You know we love you!! I've actually toyed with the idea of not blogging anymore but then I'd miss out of all of the bloggerly friends I've made and I just can't do that.

Just keep popping by to let us know you're alive, m'kay?

January 11, 2012 at 12:19 AM  
Blogger Ellie said...

A man throwing a hissy fit .... like Santa in your foto, breaking gender divides. Glad to see you back. X

January 11, 2012 at 3:44 AM  
Blogger nursemyra said...

I've been fretting at your absence. did you get my email? so so glad you're back xx

January 11, 2012 at 4:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I thought the greeks got you, in between naps.

January 11, 2012 at 5:45 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Rob: I recently saw WIT, a play about a woman with cancer. It made me feel like a big baby. A complainer. All is well relatively speaking.

Ponita: Taking some time off WAS kind liberating in a way. I'm an advocate of taking a breather.

Ellie: If you ask my beautiful bride, she will confirm that I am a bog hissy fit thrower.

nurse: I did NOT receive an email from you! I answered all the emails that were sent to me. It's the polite thing to do. Daisy, if you're reading, can you pass along my personal email to her?

Anon: Tough guys don't nap. Although we do throw hissy fits once in a while.

January 11, 2012 at 7:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i mean in between naps for the greeks

January 11, 2012 at 7:18 AM  
Anonymous nuttycow said...

You're back! Huzzah from this side of the pond.

x

January 11, 2012 at 7:39 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Anon: As 80's pop gods ABC would say, The message is perfectly simple. The meaning is clear.

NC: You are my alpha reader. The first! Patient zero, as it were. I am, indeed, back. For now. But life had better not piss me off again or else.

January 11, 2012 at 7:46 AM  
Anonymous looby said...

Christmas can have that introspective effect. I'm glad to see you back, but if blogging ever stops being enjoyable or at least useful in a virtual friend-y sort of way, or even a moaning way, it's not wrth doing.

All the best for 2012. And really, a man who has Daisyfae coming to see him hasn't really got much to complain about :)

January 11, 2012 at 8:06 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

looby: That's really the crux of why I quit for a while. I didn't have anything nice to say and wasn't looking forward to posting. So I didn't! I also fell away from reading blogs because, for me, the two activities are linked. And, yes, many have threatened to visit but Daisyfae has followed-through more than once.

January 11, 2012 at 8:21 AM  
Blogger Adam Kenny said...

It is nice to have you back. I hope that you, the Missus and the girls had an enjoyable Christmas and transition into 2012. As someone who writes on a daily basis, I totally get what you mean when you speak of what you missed and a sense of longing.

As someone who loves reading your stuff - and who always digs the great pics that accompany the words - it's nice to see you back here.

What the hell may I ask is Foursquare?

January 11, 2012 at 9:29 AM  
Blogger Kono said...

Glad to see you're alive, hell man no one reads my shit, no one comments, i don't give a shit, as Buk said if i ain't entertained no one is, hope things be looking up in the big apple.

January 11, 2012 at 9:56 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

AK: Thank you for your kind words. Foursquare, as I understand it (and I may be mistaken) is a social media site that allows you to "check-in" to a bar or restaurant. Then your friends know you're there and can join you. If you check-in more than anyone else, you become the "Mayor" of that establishment. It all sounds like a free promotion scheme to me cooked up in some ad agency's board room.

kono: Do you know what it says on Bukowski's tombstone? "Don't try." Excellent advice. If I weren't such a needy little girl I would heed it.

January 11, 2012 at 10:20 AM  
Blogger SJF said...

He's baaaccckkkk. Glad to see you posting once again.

January 12, 2012 at 10:21 AM  
Blogger Kono said...

You know there are many different ways to interpret what Buk has on his tombstone, as a man who's been in more than his fair share of bar fights and shady situations i always adopted the "Don't Try", you're gonna fucking lose, i'll kick your ass interpretation of it, you know "don't try, i'm to much of a badass for you."

January 12, 2012 at 10:37 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Sharon: Didn't I just tell you I was through with blogging? Didn't we have that conversation a few evenings ago at WIT? So much for my credibility.

kono: Interesting interpretation. I always thought it meant that if you try too hard at something i.e., writing, acting, sleeping with as many women as possible, it'll never happen. Go with the natural flow and let thing unfold at their own pace.

January 12, 2012 at 11:29 AM  
OpenID livingladolcevita said...

Well, well. I'm back. And miserable too. Coincidence? I think not. Let's whinge together.

January 12, 2012 at 2:42 PM  
Blogger Kono said...

Of course if you don't try you'll never know...

January 13, 2012 at 8:44 AM  
Blogger Eryl said...

Nice to see you back, I was just shaping up to email you. Having had a bit of a blogging break myself, though, I didn't want to rush at you, if that makes sense.

The eight armed manic christmas shopper is great, as is the exhausted santa, something feeder's hand biting about them.

January 13, 2012 at 9:14 AM  
Anonymous Sid said...

I did wonder what happened to you. Whenever a blogger goes quiet, I can't help but wonder if he/she had passed on. Glad you're back.

January 16, 2012 at 3:05 AM  
Blogger JZ said...

yo. what up. i've been gone as well.... think nothing of your absence and its effect on me... we all need a break to remind us of why we love our friends, family and the things we do. Glad to have you back. In the meantime, I started something....not sure how long it'll last, but go to http://ooo-tfo.posterous.com/ ... we will see if this really has any value.... (as far as I can tell, nobody's reading anyway...)

oh...and i love that 8-armed Vishnu Consumer...brilliant. That is why I avoid the mall...in any season...

January 17, 2012 at 10:58 AM  
Anonymous Downingufnw said...

i mean in between naps for the greeks

November 11, 2012 at 8:50 PM  

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