The Unbearable Banishment: home again. i like to be here when I can.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

home again. i like to be here when I can.

Last evening was the first time since I started working for A Company Called Malice, Inc. that I got home before The Daughters were sleeping. I read to them for the first time in over a month. What a treat! Nobody has ever been as happy to see me walk into a room as The Daughters. You can see it in their faces. It’s sincere.

I’m sure when they’re angst-filled teens they’ll hate my guts but at this stage of the game, they still run up to me and wrap their arms around my waist (7-Year Old) and leg (3-Year Old) when they see me.

I was a reluctant father and had children very late in the game. I still believe that my life would have been just as satisfying if I hadn’t had them. I would have been one of those crusty old New Yorkers who everyone wants dead so they can have my apartment. That would have been fine with me.

But I have to admit; the attention they lavish on me is deeply satisfying. It’s a foreign sensation, as I never felt that way about my own father. As soon as I was old enough, I made damn sure I was out of the house when he got home from work. And that’s all I’m going to say about that.


Anonymous nuttycow said...

It's great that your kids have a father who loves them so much. Have you decided what you're going to do about the job?

May 19, 2009 at 8:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You're one of those hip/sarcastic fathers, aren't you?

Congrats on the job landing. Any job in this economy is still a job...


May 19, 2009 at 11:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

similar sentiments regarding children - i adore them, enjoy them, and derive tremendous joy from their very existence. yet can imagine a perfectly satisfactory life on my own...

May 19, 2009 at 11:57 AM  
Blogger Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

It scared me to think there were people my age with children when i was 16. It still scares me that there are people my age with children at aged 24.

May 19, 2009 at 12:34 PM  
Blogger Ellie said...

I had to get a dog. :)

May 19, 2009 at 4:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hear you on the having kids thing.

May 19, 2009 at 6:28 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Nutty: I haven’t received their formal written offer (it’s a process!) but I’ve accepted the position.

SA: Actually, except for the hours it’s a GREAT job! Where've you been?

Daisy: Those who want kids had better be ready to have their freedom snatched away (if you’re going to be a halfway decent parent, that is). It’s why I waited so long.

Jo: If I had had kids when I was in my 20s it most certainly would have crashed and burned.

Ellie: You can work your way up the evolutionary ladder.

Annie: It’s not a sentiment many people like to voice but I think we all feel it.

May 19, 2009 at 9:20 PM  
Blogger ~E said...

keep the warm and fuzzy feelings from yesterday with you till they pass through teen-dom. Trust me, if me as a teenager was any indication, you're gonna need it.

May 19, 2009 at 9:41 PM  
Blogger Sid said...

I don't know. I still love running up to my dad and wrapping my arms around him. So if your daughters do end up hating your guts during their teenage years maybe, just maybe it won't last forever?

May 20, 2009 at 4:43 AM  
Blogger Cat said...

I never really wanted kids, so when I had them, I felt the same way you did for a long time. Glad I had them, but I could have been just as happy without them. Now that they've been around so long (17 & 14), I have come to realize my life would have been pretty empty without them.

And the teen years have been great for me. Not without some issues, but I love them at this age. My husband has had a really hard time, though. He's the one who wanted to have kids, and I think he is having a very hard time letting them go.

May 20, 2009 at 8:14 AM  
Blogger A Free Man said...

Isn't that just awesome, that look? I love picking up my boy from day care. He barrels at me full speed and just jumps into my arms. Nothing, NOTHING better than that.

May 21, 2009 at 12:50 AM  
Blogger Blues said...

great post. Ugh. I want that. I do remember feeling that way with my parents, but then it´s so radically different from how I felt as a teen, just repulsed.

May 30, 2009 at 6:57 AM  

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