The Unbearable Banishment: My 9-5 fantasy

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

My 9-5 fantasy

I’m grateful to have found work after being laid off but I have begun a casual job search for something else. A Company Called Malice, Inc. came to my rescue in my time of need, but since then it has been slowly grinding me down. Mrs. Wife, correct me if I’m mistaken, but since I started in mid-April I have not had one dinner at home during the week. Not ONE!

There’s a degree of maliciousness to it. The workload doesn’t always require such “dedication” but at the level I was hired on, I am not permitted to work a 40 hour week. The unwritten law at A Company Called Malice is: Company first, family a distant second and friends? Don’t even think about it. It’s anti-family. It’s anti-humanity.

That’s all well and good if you aspire to be a Managing Director but I don’t give a shit about that stuff and never will. I miss my girls. Just showing up at home on the weekends is a recipe for a failed marriage and resentful children. I thought I lived in a more enlightened age but apparently I was mistaken.

Then Mrs. Wife stumbled across this fantasy:

Rare Book Seller
Bauman Rare Books

We seek, for our Las Vegas gallery, an articulate, well-read, energetic individual for a long-term, full-time Bookseller position. Etc., etc., etc.

Okay. Calm down. So. Let me get this straight. It’s a job at one of the premier rare book dealers in the United States selling rare books out of their newly-opened location in the Palazzo in Las Vegas? Be still, my beating heart.

Long-time readers and family members will know that this is a marriage of my two primary passions in life: rare books and craps. I would be happy to hang out in Bauman Rare Books and help people research and purchase rare books for FREE and you’re telling me they want to pay someone to do it? The salary isn’t anywhere near what I make at A Company Called Malice, Inc., but I can make up the difference at the crap tables during my off hours. Can’t you see how perfect this is?


Blogger Cat said...

"but I can make up the difference at the craps table." Those are some famous last words.

September 29, 2009 at 8:41 AM  
Blogger Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

I'm trying to work out whether your kids would hate you more for working every hour god sends and only coming home at the weekend, or if spending any future inheritance they might be coming into on a riotously good game of craps in Vegas ;)

September 29, 2009 at 8:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think I used to work for one of the parent companies of the one you work for and you're so right about the importance of being around for your kids and wife.

I regret every minute I gave my former company when I should have been doing things with my daughter at night, on the weekends, and certainly on Christmas Eve.

These days, I just say no to any job where they expect you to join conference calls from your vacation at the beach!

September 29, 2009 at 12:25 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Cat: Famous last words of a bunch of losers who bet the sucker proposition bets in the middle of the table, but not me!

Jo: I didn't get a damn thing from my father and I turned out just fine, didn't I? I vote for a riotously good time in Vegas.

Gifts: A nice philosophy, but I have this annoying mortgage to pay. The economy is still in the tank and I can't afford such a cavalier stance.

[BTW, I don’t recall ever receiving a comment from you and yet you know where I work. Have we met? Did you spend any time in the Big House?]

September 29, 2009 at 1:11 PM  
Blogger Leah said...

Rare books and craps. You lil ole maverick you.

September 29, 2009 at 4:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

cost of living in vegas used to be dirt cheap - they got clocked in the real estate debacle. you might be surprised... look into it. nothing ventured, nothing gained!

September 29, 2009 at 5:36 PM  
Anonymous neeeekole. said...

dude.. go for it. seriously.

i <3 u

September 30, 2009 at 1:39 AM  
Blogger A Free Man said...

I know you're probably half kidding, but why the hell not? Get a job you would love and more time with your family - a bit less money? Make do.

September 30, 2009 at 1:47 AM  
Blogger Tennyson ee Hemingway said...

Go for it, my man. Just go for it.

September 30, 2009 at 1:56 AM  
Blogger ~E said...

So are you moving to Vegas? Because it's like 120 degrees at midnight there!

September 30, 2009 at 3:52 AM  
Anonymous nursemyra said...

One of our staff rang today and asked for a week off without giving any prior warning, said her mother was going to have an operation and she wanted to be around for the recovery period.

The D.O.N. said "Of course, your family is your priority. Take as long as you need."

I may be a committed atheist but there are advantages to working for a religious organisation ;-)

September 30, 2009 at 4:52 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Leah: I've always been kind of mavericky.

Daisy: I would think the tanking economy would drive the cost of living *down*, i.e., cheaper homes. No?

N: Yeah. So you can visit, right?

AFM and TE: I'd have to give up NYC. I'm not ready to do that yet. I don’t know if I ever will be.

E: I lived in Phoenix for about 18 months and hated it for that very reason. Maybe you're right.

Nurse: I did that at A Company Called Malice but they'd probably give my job away in my absence.

September 30, 2009 at 6:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

yes, real estate values were in the pooper, but it was starting to rebound there a few months back... large homes, landscaped with rocks (ie: no mowing the grass), for ~$200k...

September 30, 2009 at 7:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sounds like a good dream until you figure out the babysitters are on the other side of the United States.

September 30, 2009 at 7:07 PM  
Blogger Blues said...

I don't know if I could do Vegas for more than two days. But the job does sound good.

October 17, 2009 at 11:30 AM  

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