The Unbearable Banishment: Boooooo! <i>FAKE!</i>

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Boooooo! FAKE!

I walked up to Central Park to see David Blaine hang upside down.

I saw Street Magic years ago on TV and thought it was a lot of fun. I like that he fucked with the denizens of the Lower East Side, where I happen to be living at the time. They deserved to be fucked with. After that, he performed a series of stunts here in the city that I saw in person. I saw him buried alive for seven days, stand in a block of ice for 63 hours, stand on a 90 foot high pillar for 35 hours, spin in a gyroscope for 16 hours and be submerged in water for seven days.

I didn’t feel a burning desire to see this latest stunt, but I have a collect ‘em all mentality and thought I shouldn’t miss it. It’s like those damn Harry Potter books. You can’t bail out if you’ve read through book IV.

Today in the paper, it was announced that Fox News caught him taking stand-up breaks. WTF! When confronted, Blaine’s reps said he “never intended to stay upside down for 60 consecutive hours.” What a liar. He probably cheated on the other stunts as well. Maybe he should run for office.


OpenID daisyfae said...

A phoney magician? stunned, shocked and amazed...

he should be punished. by being hung upside down for 61 hours...

September 24, 2008 at 1:35 PM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

Yea, I guess you’re right. I should have suspected all along. But I like to give myself over to the performance and hope it is what it appears to be. You can take the boy out of Ohio, etc.

September 24, 2008 at 1:41 PM  
Blogger bob said...

David Blaine's from Ohio?

September 24, 2008 at 6:42 PM  
OpenID anniegirl1138 said...

That's why it's called "illusion" I guess.

September 24, 2008 at 10:35 PM  
Blogger sid said...

Man you New Yorkers are so lucky. You get to witness all this really kewl things. Here the only vanishing acts we get to witness is the kind involving money and politians.

September 25, 2008 at 2:50 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

bob: Doh!

annie: Yes, but I always try to buy into the illusion. I’m an easy audience.

sid: New Yorker’s also have the advantage of watching your political meltdowns from a safe distance.

September 25, 2008 at 9:08 AM  
OpenID popomaticjeff said...

I think his greatest trick is that he continues to attract any audience at all.

September 26, 2008 at 9:23 AM  
Anonymous Rob said...

David Blaine's done some freaky shit, to be sure. But he is, after all, an illusionist.

I like Penn & Teller cuz they always 'splain the trick afterward. Like the one where they "disappeared" a submarine. The end credits of the TV show were over video of a couple of helicopters flying away with the sub cabled to it.

September 26, 2008 at 1:11 PM  

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