The Unbearable Banishment: Always Read the Fine Print

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Always Read the Fine Print

I called Citibank to ask why my Thank You Points didn't post to my account for October. Mrs. Wife and I accumulate points by using our credit card and checking account. They’re great! You get free stuff! In September we used our points for a round-trip ticket to London.

Citi Rep: Mr. Banishment, you have reached your 75,000 point per year maximum.

Me: What maximum?

Citi Rep: It’s in the agreement you signed. You can only accumulate 75,000 points per year.

Me: So, for my fourth quarter purchases, including Christmas shopping, I’ll earn ZERO points?

Citi Rep: That's correct. It was in the agreement.

Ah, well. I suppose it's my fault. But Citibank took advantage of my unwillingness to read the fine print of a contract. Shame on them.

* * *

I had a last-minute replacement masseuse last week. Getting a massage is such an intense, personal experience. When you’ve been married for as long as I have, taking all of your clothes off in a dark room and having a strange, young woman walk in and rub you down from head to toe is a bit unsettling. Not unpleasant. Just a little disconcerting. Familiarity breeds comfort. Using the same masseuse all the time alleviates the anxiety. Plus, she gets to know where the knots are. Having a replacement thrown into the mix at the last minute is a bit jarring.

She didn't seem to care. I suppose I was just another client to her. You walk around thinking you're one in a million but the truth is you're just a dime a dozen.

* * *

Well, that was an utterly meaningless post. Sorry, folks. Sometimes you smack it over the center field fence and other times you tap a dribbler to the pitcher's mound.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

we all tap a dribbler occasionally... nice turn of a phrase. reminds me of a date i went on once...

October 25, 2008 at 2:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said... least you didn't get the male-former-wrestler-with-a-grudge as your stand in masseuse (masseur?). i think you'd have a different definition of 'uncomfortable'.

October 25, 2008 at 6:09 PM  
Blogger Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Re: the citibank arses, clearly the solution is to use another credit card completely over the most lucrative time of the year. Their loss.

October 26, 2008 at 6:29 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

daisy: You have to be careful. Too many dribblers and you're sent to the minor leagues.

gnu: I always request a girl masseuse. It's the only time I can have another woman touch me and not have it result in divorce.

jo: I thought about that but we only have one credit card and I'd like to keep it that way. What to do?

October 26, 2008 at 8:44 AM  

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