The Unbearable Banishment: Holiday

Wednesday, October 1, 2008


Happy birthday, Mrs. Wife! It’s hard to believe that an old stag like me was able to turn the head of a young gazelle like you.

Fun fact: The age difference between Mrs. Wife and me is EXACTLY THE SAME as the age difference between me and Mrs. Mother-in-Law.

Eww. I know what you're thinking. Don’t even go there.

* * *

Mrs. Wife had a doctor appointment last Saturday morning at 10:00 o’clock. She claims she told me what the appointment was for but I don’t recall that being the case. I was watching the daughters and received the following text message from her:

Dijkated tajing kjnmmg
hope to be kome soon

Oh, my God! Are they dissecting her brain?! Did she ingest a powerful opiate? It gave me a genuine fright. Later I found out the text should have read:

Dilated. Taking long.
Hope to be home soon.

She was at the optometrist. Her eyes were dilated. Her brain was, and is, fully intact.


Blogger Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

The age gap between me and the boyfriend is a year and a day.

(I'm older)


October 1, 2008 at 2:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday to Mrs.Wife.

My late Mr. Husband was ten years younger than I am. His parents were, fortunately old enough to technically be mine too although MIL's youngest sis is just a few years older than I am.

October 1, 2008 at 3:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

my ex husband was 10 years older than me, stephen was four years younger.

hey, when I first read "dilated, taking long time" my first thought was childbirth!

October 1, 2008 at 5:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please tell Mrs. Wife to enjoy the weekend! I think you should call your brother-in-law and suggest a weekend away for his wife.

October 2, 2008 at 8:38 AM  

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