The Unbearable Banishment: Vanity, thy name is Unbearable

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Vanity, thy name is Unbearable

And on top of all these other really terrible things happening, I got a bad haircut! I look like a prematurely graying plucked chicken. All for $30 + $5 tip.

People who have know me for any length of time know that deep inside I am a vain little girl and that getting a bad haircut is a very serious matter. But the premature gray part doesn't bother me too terribly much, especially in light of the other current nightmares that have set down at my table and refuse to get up and leave, even though I've begged, pleaded, demanded and cajoled them to do so. Actually, I don't care if my hair turns purple. As long as it doesn't fall out. *Shudder!*

There's a saying—a curse, actually—that's frequently attributed to the Chinese:

May you live in interesting times.

Its authenticity as being Chinese is doubtful, but it's meant for your enemies, with "interesting" meaning horrible. These have been some of the most interesting days I've ever experienced. I pray to Bog Almighty that they end already and that things never, ever get this interesting for me again. Dullness is my new mantra.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. We're suppose to be thankful for the good things. And I am. But I'd be a lot more thankful if certain things would go the fuck away and leave me and my family alone.

I'm the man in the box
Buried in my shit
Won't you come and save me?

I'm the dog who gets beat

Shove my nose in shit

Won't you come and save me?

Man in the Box
Alice in Chains


Blogger Here In Franklin said...

UB--I've been missing you and hope that whatever shit has flown in your windows flies out soon.

November 25, 2009 at 9:25 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

wish i could provide comfort, but that's a rough cut. it shall grow. it's cold outside. wear a hat?

here's to brighter days ahead. take care...

November 25, 2009 at 10:25 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

UB - your absence has been notable. But, I understand there are reasons and hope that your lot improves in a timely fashion.

About the "premature" gray? Dude, you're older than I am (by a bit) and at our age gray is not really "premature". Mine starting graying in my early 30's. And, sadly, it started thinning in my early 20's. I had no chance, what with male pattern baldness on both sides of parental lineage. Arghh.

November 25, 2009 at 11:28 PM  
Blogger Sid said...

Glad you're back. Been wondering about you. Sorry to hear that life has been rather "interesting" for you. Happy thanksgiving.

November 26, 2009 at 1:27 AM  
Anonymous nursemyra said...

haircut looks great to me! then again, I'm really attracted to guys who shave their heads so what would I know?

sorry things haven't been going well xx

November 26, 2009 at 3:05 AM  
Blogger Leah said...

Hope you're okay--you've been much missed!

And I admit that I have had silver strands since my late teens, which meant that I was well used to it and got to avoid the trauma of it all...

November 26, 2009 at 5:31 AM  
Blogger mapstew said...

Somedays life just sucks!
Other days it bounces out of the box and drags us with it onto a roller-coaster ride of excitement! I think some of us are due the latter pretty soon!

I think your haircut is cool.
Then again, that's coming from a guy who ain't got none!


November 26, 2009 at 7:49 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

All: Thanks TONS for your kind words. I don't mind an occasional "poor me" post, but the past few weeks would have provided nothing but that. Everybody's life sucks! My troubles aren't that unique.

HIF: I'm counting on Santa to do just that.

Daisy: I've already told you that you provide more solace than you know.

Rob: I choose to believe that I am TOO DAMN YOUNG for gray hair. Sir.

Sid: "Back" is relative. Do you know about Thanksgiving in SA?

Nurse: That's so funny! My good pal, Nurse H, also likes bald men. Does it have something to do with healthcare?

Leah: Do you color? That's fine for you gals but I'm not THAT vain.

Map: I can take a few "days" of life sucking but this seems to be never ending. I feel like I'm being punished but I can't connect the crime.

November 26, 2009 at 1:08 PM  
Blogger Ellie said...

What everyone else said.

November 27, 2009 at 2:40 AM  
Blogger JZ said...

grayness: bring it. it connotes wisdom and general 'fuck-you-all-i'm-in-charge"ness.....

baldness: despite tenuous links to high levels of testosterone, I don't need to be bald to affirm my man-ness....and i'm still shaving my head if it happens....baldness just sux. Ess. Yoo. Ex. Sux.

good to see you feel inspired to write a bit more...i did not realize my need for TUB was as dire until a few days passed while you were on your R&R....i perhaps share some of your stresses, albeit in different rooms of my life...hang in there, brother, and use this site as a means to the ends you require but don't ever let it be a burden.....

November 27, 2009 at 12:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Some men are sexier without hair despite what they think and if a man is intelligent, creative and has a good is the last thing required to make them attractive.

Added to that, when you toss the great father component into the mix, I would say you've got no worries as far as hair is concerned.

I am sorry to hear that everything else has been sucky for you lately. I've been there and thankfully I've moved into a better phase of my life. I hope things turn around for you soon.

November 27, 2009 at 2:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Welcome back I have really missed my morning readings! It usually is the first thing I do when I get to work...hence I have actually had to start working right away-ugh

November 29, 2009 at 2:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I cried (and my mom threw a very unladylike tantrum) the first time they messed up my haircut. I was 7 yrs old and after a few misdirected snips and miscommunicated 25 minutes what was supposed to be a "trim" to my waist length black hair ended up being a short bob that barely reached my shoulders. I feel you on the vanity my dear...truly I do.

December 6, 2009 at 6:01 AM  

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