Photo Booth Follies
The apple never falls far from the tree. This is 5-Year Old Daughter and I from a few days ago.
I must have looked at these pictures 1,000 times. I look at them when I've got the blues and they make me happy. I look at them when I'm happy and they make me happier. Sometimes, if I'm in a certain mood, I'll look at them and get choked up. What a pussy!
I hope I can keep it together and not do anything stupid to hurt my girls. Everyone makes occasional dumb choices in life. It's part of the human condition. I'm not immune. Neither are you. Yeah, I'm talking to you. I just hope that when it's my turn to stumble, I only cause harm to myself. That I can live with.
When I begin my morning commute, I usually pop in my earbuds to check the news and see if the world imploded overnight. Last week my earbud felt kind of funny so I reached up to adjust it and it popped of the cord and wedged itself into my ear canal. I panicked!
See it there? The orange rubber stopper sticking out? I took this with my iPhone pointed at the side of my head.
This was at 5:50 a.m. mind you, so I wasn't exactly at the top of my game when it came to dealing with a medical crisis. I spent the next 1:15 trying to dig the thing out of my head. My big, clumsy, sausage fingers only succeed in pushing it deeper into my ear canal. I got a pen and tried to dig it out but all that got me was an ear full of ink marks.
I did a chant to calm myself down. As soon as I got into the city, I ran to the nearest drug store and bought a pair of Revlon tweezers, walked to an empty aisle and carefully extracted the earbud. Let that be a lesson to you.
I must have looked at these pictures 1,000 times. I look at them when I've got the blues and they make me happy. I look at them when I'm happy and they make me happier. Sometimes, if I'm in a certain mood, I'll look at them and get choked up. What a pussy!
I hope I can keep it together and not do anything stupid to hurt my girls. Everyone makes occasional dumb choices in life. It's part of the human condition. I'm not immune. Neither are you. Yeah, I'm talking to you. I just hope that when it's my turn to stumble, I only cause harm to myself. That I can live with.
* * *
Bonus Photo Booth Grotesque
When I begin my morning commute, I usually pop in my earbuds to check the news and see if the world imploded overnight. Last week my earbud felt kind of funny so I reached up to adjust it and it popped of the cord and wedged itself into my ear canal. I panicked!
See it there? The orange rubber stopper sticking out? I took this with my iPhone pointed at the side of my head.This was at 5:50 a.m. mind you, so I wasn't exactly at the top of my game when it came to dealing with a medical crisis. I spent the next 1:15 trying to dig the thing out of my head. My big, clumsy, sausage fingers only succeed in pushing it deeper into my ear canal. I got a pen and tried to dig it out but all that got me was an ear full of ink marks.
I did a chant to calm myself down. As soon as I got into the city, I ran to the nearest drug store and bought a pair of Revlon tweezers, walked to an empty aisle and carefully extracted the earbud. Let that be a lesson to you.
posted by The Unbearable Banishment at
1:20 PM
15 Comments:
sugar, the coconut krewe is all grown up and some are starting their own krewes and i SWEAR i still kick myself wondering if i could have done something differently, blah, blah, blah...all of that to say, you'll be fine, your girls will be fine and if not, at some point you'll all make jokes about who's going to pay for the therapy bills! *LOL* (ok, that's still a crackup line around here. bear that in mind, we're a very warped krewe.) i digress again, anyway and anywho, dude, you figured out out to extract an earbud AND you have tweezers JUST in case it ever happens again! :D xoxoxoxo
(can you tell? too much chocolate and too much coffee today.)
Completely bonkers, both of you! In the loveliest possible way.
those pictures are beyond fabulous! i have a fondness for photo booths and bumper cars!
did you, um... actually BUY the tweezers, after using them in your ear? curious...
oh, and like savannah, we have LONG had jokes about future therapy. from the time my children were school age, i'd say "Suck it up. It'll come out in therapy when you're 21". Both noted on their 21st birthdays that i owed them A LOT of therapy...
Maybe we can have a contest to see who's the biggest pussy, lol, i do the same thing all the time with the boyos, usually just in awe and wondering what the fuck i did to deserve the kind of happiness they've brought me, and yes we'll screw up, that's life, it's also an opportunity to teach the chillen' to learn from daddy's mistakes, to let them know that no matter how hard you try you will mess up, it's called life but you learn from it and get on with it... basically what Ted Geisel in that one book...
that you paired pics of the youngest with your ear bud disaster is perfect....because it is something SHE would do.
But never the eldest daughter who, fortunately, is more like her mother and would never make this hysterically foolish mistake.
And the lesson is: do NOT put anything in your ears or up your nose. Its like talking to children!!!!!
I love the mischievous twinkle in your little girl's eyes. My Dad and I had the same fun relationship. All I would say - for future years - trust her.
Sav: Which begs the question...is 5 too young for therapy? It's best to nip this neurosis thing in the bud. I doubt it's covered under my cheesy health care plan, though.
dinah: My only real concern is that I also raise her to bonkers in the LEAST loveliest way. It could happen if I'm not vigilant!
daisy: Who doesn't like county fairs? And what part of a county fair is the most satisfying? Bumper cars and photo booths. We haven't landed far from the buckeye tree, have we?
kono: I accept your challenge! May the biggest pussy win. If you'd like, we can throw in a "biggest screw-up" side wager. Bring your best (worst) game.
M: Actually, you reminded me...M. and I had to drive back from a Springsteen concert at Giants Stadium because she stuck a bead in her ear when she was only 2! She really is a chip off the old block! We had to leave just as the concert was about to start.
Pat: I can't be faulted! They're EARBUDS for cryin' out loud! That daughter is the devilish one. She'll be the one to date a member of Hell's Angels.
I always carry a pair of tweezers in my bag. you should be commuting with me.
(Tell Mrs UB I enjoyed The Poisoner's Handbook. It was her recommendation wasn't it?)
You would have stuck your tweezers in my ear?! What a darling friend you are. My Bride did, indeed, gush over "The Poisoner's Handbook." Did I mention that in a post? I can't remember how you would have gotten that tidbit.
It helps to give yourself little sermons sometimes like this; and in public they have more of a force.
I was in a nightclub once and the music was too loud so I improvised some ear plugs. Ended up in the hospital at 3am telling the receptionist "I've got a cloakroom ticket stuck in my ear."
she's a doll and these pictures will bring pleasure esp in your latter years. LOL
yikes. thank goodness you didnt push it in further.
looby: I'll refer back to this post after I've screwed something up and give myself an "I told you so." I used a ripped up napkin as an ear plug once. Necessity is the mother of invention!
suki: Looks, however doll-like, are deceiving. She's a caged tiger in real life.
When I was a little kid I stuck a spitball in my ear and forgot about it. The doctor found it like two years later. I think that's the last mistake I made that only hurt me.
lol I loved these pictures, and the story about the earbud--way too funny. I'll never look at my tweezers without laughing now.
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