The Unbearable Banishment: nothing says “happy mother’s day” quite like horseracing

Thursday, May 14, 2009

nothing says “happy mother’s day” quite like horseracing

Monmouth Park Racetrack, New Jersey’s premier home for thoroughbred racing, opens on Mother’s Day weekend and bringing mom to the track on her special day is a Garden State tradition. We all went with my mother- and father-in-law in tow.

The horses are called to the starting gate before each race by the At The Post trumpet.

My father-in-law poured over the racing program before each race. He performed complicated mathematical calculations that took track condition, jockey weight, length of race and performance history into account. Each painfully scrutinized bet resulted in one crushing loss after another.

I asked 3-year old daughter which horse would win.


“Number 3? The number 3 horse is going to win?”

“Yes. Free.”

Of course, number 3 won. This happened a few times. Try to imagine how satisfying that was.

The girls anxiously eye the finish line. Placing a $2 bet is a critical life skill that should be taught to your children. When she's 14 I'll show her where the sucker bets are on a crap table.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

We are going to the Mountaineer this weekend can I barrow her for some roulette?

May 14, 2009 at 12:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

When I lived in Little Rock I loved going to Oaklawn in Hot Springs. I used to park in Bill Clinton's aunt's driveway--she lived right across the street from the track. (One of Bill's family members was a good friend of mine.)

May 14, 2009 at 5:10 PM  
Anonymous Greg T said...

I love Manmouth Park. They have those spots you can rent out and have big parties, they have a huge grill etc. It is so NJ! Super Tri_Fecta....Tony Soprano style.

May 15, 2009 at 1:22 AM  
Blogger ~E said...

don't ever underestimate the power of beginners luck.

or dumb luck for that reason.

May 15, 2009 at 6:20 AM  
Blogger Sid said...

I can't believe you taught your daughter how to bet. LOL

May 15, 2009 at 6:47 AM  
Blogger A Free Man said...

Is there a father-daughter trip to AC planned in the future?

May 15, 2009 at 7:14 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

MT: To hell with the girls. I’M coming!

HIF: Living across the street from a track (or casino, for that matter) would probably be a recipe for disaster for me.

Greg: YES! Lots and lots of Soprano extras are roaming around at the track. We’re doing a holding pen picnic for the upcoming holiday.

E: I hope my daughter has an unexplainable gift for picking horses.

Sid: You Dad never taught you? What a shame!

AFM: Atlantic City is the bottom of the ditch. Every time I feel bad about my career or financial status, I take a trip down there and have a look around. I end up feeling a lot better about myself.

May 15, 2009 at 8:11 AM  

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